"Lovers"

Peace and blessings to all. I hope your journey is well and peaceful if any thing has happened to you disturb you since that last time you read my blog I pray that your tensions are released as you move forward in your journey in the Name of Jesus, Amen.

These days we have to not only stay in peace but also seek it. Yep, it’s so much going on in the world, our environments, our families and our lives that easily distract us from our peace. Not only do we need to stay in peace, but we also must be mindful to be peacemakers, no matter how small or large the discord.

If you love, truly love that means you care, and that equates to caring about humanity. So we, let’s call ourselves “lovers” since we have established that we love. Now if you’re a lover it’s impossible to go through every day and not care about the state of the human conditions. Wars, famines, severe weather, hunger, sickness, poverty, and the list goes ons. Natural and man made disaster are causing people to live uncomfortable lives. But that’s not what I’m going to focus on, because we all have remarkable coping skills, some way much better than others. 

I don’t get why some seem to invite what I perceive as chaos or darkness into not only their lives, but their environment.  Currently I live in Chicago and if you watch the news any place in the world you should know that this city has become a murder capital. But that’s no surprise this city has been made itself known before because of that. Young people killing young people, umph, umph, umph. So sad, it makes me sad, but at the same time I see and hear the beauty in the trees.

I’m just saying! Stuff is ugly you guys, real ugly so let’s work harder at rejecting darkness and also helping others reject darkness and embrace some light! We need to love more, to love better and harder. People pass by each in hallways, on the street and would prefer to drop their head instead of extending a greeting to the next person. I mean literally look you in the face and at the moment you’re going to pass each other they will either look away or drop their head. Your smile, your hello can mean a lot to a person. You never know what that person is experiencing in their life and your warmth just may be their lifeline. Let’s take time to greet one another. Okay, do we lovers have a deal?!

Peace starts from within, and like love, if you don’t have it you can’t give it. You can never stop to smell the roses if you don’t see them. Understand? We have to be attentive to peace and each other. Now some people and things you’ll have to make a certain kind of peace with and keep it moving. Got me?!

All I’m saying is that there is so much to love and enjoy in this life, even in the midst of our troubles. Look at the beauty in the skies, the colors around you, listen to the birds and focus on what’s good and or the good you’re expecting to come.

GOD is a great GOD and whether you believe me or not HE does not want us to suffer. HE created us to praise HIM, and in HIS infinite wisdom HE knows we’re less likely to praise HIM things are going badly. So HE wants us to be well and to live peacefully not just alone, but each other.

I'm Just Saying

I DID IT!

Yes I did and I’m so thankful! First, all honor and praises go to GOD, because all good and perfect gifts are from and through HIM! My life is a testimony and so is yours if you acknowledge it.

 

Not only did I do it, but I did some more. Yep, every door that I knocked on opened. What I set my mind to came to fruition. Now some of these things have been in my prayers and on my heart for years. Others came to me through my spirit and I trusted and believed what I heard would come to pass, all I had to do was obey the quiet voice I heard inside of me. Remember I told you a couple of weeks ago that I had to still myself, tune out the external so I can hear that soft Spirit that speaks to me, comforts me and guides me.

Let me tell you that when the spirit speaks, be quiet and listen. No one can ever know more than the creator and we are all created with a plan for our use and purpose in this life. I’m so thankful that I understand my purpose so far and wait for the revelation for what’s ahead of me for my future. That’s exciting news! I don’t want or need a psychic, humph, what I got is the essence of all truths. HalleluJAH.

Many years ago, in the eighties to be exact I desired to start my own business. I had no business skills or any idea of what kind of business I wanted to start. The only thing I knew was that I wanted to be self-sufficient. I didn’t have any resources, but I had me. So I decided I would be my business. Yep, me. No I wasn’t I going to sell my body, believe me I’ve done that before and it didn’t work out well at all. What I decided to do was tell my story, the truth about my life; an open door access to my failures and successes. Besides I know that my journey is not just for me, but a benefit to someone else. Sure, sure, everybody’s got a story, but not everyone is willing to tell the world. I’ve swept my closet clean and the skeletons have tumbled out because I opened the door and no one else.

So I’ve done it after twenty or so some odd years of editing, rewriting, fear, rejection and skepticism, I’ve published my first book! Never A Mile From Home (my first book), is a true blessing for me and I hope it blesses you as well.Yay for me, I’m so proud of myself! It’s the first of a series of three books and this first one in the series was the hardest to write I believe. It reveals a very painful past of poor self-esteem, abuse, prostitution and prison. I’m so thankful that my pain is in the past and that it did not carry with me throughout my life. I’m so sorry for those that can’t or don’t know how to release their pain or how to be healed. Even sorrier for those who are content or wallow in their pain. It’s like the old adage of the person sitting on the tack complaining of how bad the tack feels. You’ve got to get off of it, or at least shift positions.  

I shifted my way of thinking and now I'm an owner and not a renter. Uh huh, next I'll fill you in on how I bought my condo with no money down, and no closing fees!

Trust me, you don’t have to stay down unless that’s where you want to be. You can stand! You can stand and help others stand. Don’t be afraid to change directions, what you believe or your situation and never fail to stretch out your hand to pull someone else up!

What are your hands doing?

 

 http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Never+A+Mile+From+Home

 

 

 

More to come....

Hi! I’ve really missed sharing with you, but it was a lot going on and I had to get my directions from on HIGH. When I’m searching for an answer I have to still myself, tune out the external so I can hear that soft Spirit that speaks to me, comforts me and guides me.

It’s all been worth it and I’m quite sure that you will agree with me after a few post as we play catch up.

If you’re familiar with my blog or you’re just getting into the groove with me, let me say welcome.  Always know that you’re invited to ask me questions or make comments.

Let’s see where to start?     

It’s been a year since I’ve returned to the States from Gambia, West Africa, and what a year it’s been. Fruitful indeed!

I came back to the states not knowing what to expect, but that’s life anyway. We can plan, make arrangement or set things up, but that does not mean that your plans, arrangements, or set ups will be as you wanted or expected. That is how most of life has been. Shucks, for a great portion of my life so far, I have not planned its course. In my way of thinking I believed that since GOD predestined our future any way, it’s futile to plan what’s next. I do believe that I’ve eluded to this about me in an earlier post. But these days I do make plans, but I know that GOD’s will be done.

My planned living arrangements fell through completely! I had a hotel room for a few days, but who can afford that. And who wants to live in a hotel room for an extended period? I felt trapped, caged! I could feel the energy and life of the city all around, yet I felt removed from it.

Uh uh, no, I wasn’t having that, so first things first, I prayed. Yep that’s first for me. I first expressed my thanks to GOD for making all things and praising HIM for HIS goodness, then I began to talk to HIM about my situation. I needed some transportation and I needed a place to live immediately! I trusted HE would provide and I got busy looking for both. Looking for an apartment with a short term lease wasn’t going to be easy. I had plans and they didn’t include a long term lease.

The next day I bought a reliable used vehicle and moved into temporary housing! Yes, just like that.

Now I could get down to business, spread my wings! After all that’s one of the reasons why I came back to the states from Africa. That, my family and my health. Aspects of each of these where limited while living there. Now we all know that Africa is a very, very large continent,  but I had grown so much in the time I spent there that it didn’t, no place for that matter have enough space for my wingspan.

HalleluJAH, I was getting ready to fly!     

Come soar with me!

 

On yor mark, get ready, set........

No not go yet, but in a few days it's going to be more than an earful.

I've been away from my blog for some time, but I needed my super powers to bend steel. So now since the metal has been reconfigured to my liking I can get back to filling you in on my journey.

It has been awesome! I didn't say easy, but that's what makes it so awesome. 

GOD has been and is so good to me!




Stay tuned!

Is There A Doctor In The House!?

Greetings and blessings to one and all! Whether this is the 1^st time you’re reading my blog or have been with me from day 1 when I started in Gambia, West Africa, I pray that my words touch your heart and mind: that you be encouraged, enlightened and entertained as you walk with me on my journey.

One thing I have to admit is that I have been inconsistent with writing every week as I was in Gambia. Seems I’m distracted with the goings on in my daily life of getting resettled back in Chicago.   

I came back on all around zero, so I’m working hard at filling up that which was empty! That includes but not limited to my energy, my own place to stay, a car, grounding and developing my organization here as well as maintaining it in Africa, being the matriarch for my family and making sure my health is in order. 

Let me fill you in on the healthcare exploits since my return. I commented in one of my blog post when I was in Gambia that I did not go to the doctor there unless it was an emergency. It’s not the fault of the system or people it’s just that certain things there are limited in more ways than one. So one of the 1^st things on my “to do list” when I got back here was to schedule my annual physical. Now I must say, thank GOD I have health insurance, but what’s with the referral system in healthcare? Geez!!!!

Since I’ve been back I’ve been in a hospital or clinic setting 7 times. Yep 7 times in 76 days, whoa!  Mind you I’m fairly healthy, praise GOD, but I do have an ache here and a pain there! So it seems to me wherever there is an ache or pain you’re referred to this doctor or that doctor for each thing. Huh, what!? What happened to the days that you GP took care of all that? My GP could not even interpret a test result from another doctor I’d been referred to. And oh yeah, those referrals are ten times as much per visit than that of a visit with my GP. Is there a kickback scheme to this referral thing I wonder, especially since they’re usually all in the same network!? Hmmmm....

Here’s an example: at my stage in life a colonoscopy is recommended every 5-10 years as part of a wellness physical. Ok that means a referral to a GI Doctor to schedule the procedure at the cost of $40.00. Mind you he didn’t touch or examine me. The crisp white paper on his exam table didn’t get sat on or wrinkled. He just scheduled the procedure. I started to just rip off a sheet and ball it up for the heck of it to get a piece of some $40.00 paper! Hahahahaha!!! Now in order to get the results of the procedure I have to go back to him to give me those results and spend another $40.00, Dang!  

Not to mention doctors that will give you a prescription for only 30 days and tell you to come back in 30 days for a refill. Huh, what!? That means another fee for him or her. I tell you folks it seems like a racket to me and I’m a nurse!

Now I’m far from being financially rich and thank GOD I don’t have to take a lot of medication, but $40.00 here and $50.00 there takes a chunk out of my finances. But what about those that are facing health challenges, elderly and infirmed that do need constant medical follow up and medications. This is a maze that needs to be straightened out with a quickness. Ok, I won't rant, but this is a truth about a system that is faulty and broken.

 I’m just saying!

Living For The City!

Thanks for joining me again as I continue my journey! I haven’t written as often as I was doing when I was in Gambia, West Africa because I’ve really been trying to take it all in.  It seems that it should be like riding a bicycle; once you’ve learned to ride you never forget how, but with it comes apprehension. Will I be steady enough so I don’t fall off? Will I blow a tire and what about all the traffic around me?

I think as children we don’t consider things like that, we just jump on and do it and don’t even give falling a thought. But as we mature we are more aware of both sides of the coin. I’ve been looking at both sides and one does not outweigh the other and it’s not a coin toss for me. Watching and listening to what I see going on around me I’ve decided I’m all in, whether I fall or not I’m going to jump in and do it: no matter the ridicule or danger to be faced

Geez, what is she talking about? Okay, be patient with me and I’ll tell you more. You must remember my blog is my journey and sometimes my thoughts get ahead of my fingers.

I knew that when GOD inspired me to move back to the states from Africa it was for a purpose, something greater than me. It’s what life is all about really. Our successes, failings, suffering and joy is not just for us, but for others to benefit and to learn from. So I know I’m here not just for my own advancement, but also for that of others. It seems so many, far too, too many have forgotten or don’t know that.

I am where I am today because so many mighty and brave people stood up and have fallen so that I can rise. And I say rise because I know that I have not risen to my fullest potential yet to have reached the pinnacle of my journey. I promise GOD, myself and you as I rise that I will reach back for the hand of another to help them up their mountain. Whether by word or deed it’s a responsibility I so gladly welcome and accept.

My heart aches for the children of not only this, but especially for the past two and upcoming generations: these children of the young uneducated and under educated parents. Parents that breed ignorance, anger and hatred in their own homes. You can hear it in their voices as they speak to these children calling them names that don’t bolster self esteem, but tear down dreams. You can hear it in the music they listen to and allow the children to hear. Not all music, but I’m talking about the music that turns the beast savage as oppose to soothe the savage beast: music of sex, hatred and violence. Music that insults me and assaults my ears, mind and heart played loud enough to penetrate young innocent minds.

It’s all around and easy to see in the way the females, I refuse to call them women are dressing leaving nothing to the imagination and I will not leave out the males who believe that the showing dirty underwear is a fashion statement. Not only are so called adults dressing like this, but they’re also dressing their children like that.  

It hurts! Do you hear me it hurts! And unless you are turning a blind eye and you have a heart it should hurt you too. So you say it doesn’t affect you or your community. Humph, well let me tell you if not now, then one day soon it will make a great impact on if not you then yours. I know it for a fact because what you see and hear here in these states travels all over the world. That’s right, even today in most African countries young men are walking around with the pants below the butts with their underwear on parade and our once modest sisters are not so modest any more. 

So I’m all in, whether I fall or not. I will lift up my voice to one, to ten, to the hundreds even to thousands and if only one person benefits from my voice, well then I’ve done my job.

What will you do?

 

http://youtu.be/X1uelY2SGmw

 

Who threw the deck of cards up in the air?

Yep it’s been like that. A deck of cards unshuffled, some missing, some face up and some face down scattered all about. I’ve been waiting for a time to write so I could tell you how marvelous everything is and fill you in on some major accomplishments, but truth be told things have been weird. Nothing has gone as planned, but that’s what makes life interesting and helps to build character.  

I’ve been rolling with the punches and I haven’t felt a lick! Seriously, I’m so at peace in the midst of this chaos and that is beautiful. Years ago I probably would’ve blown my stack, did some self medicating and filled my life with distractions to escape some of this craziness, but now I stay focus and keep smiling because I know that great things are coming my way. Not because I see them or have been told that by anyone, but GOD’s promises never fail. I feel and know that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be at this moment in time.

First thing is that the place where I was supposed to stay when I got here only existed in someone else’s mind and dreams. I hope that dream materializes for her more than I do for me. So after spending a few days in a hotel waiting for this dream to materialized I called out to GOD and said I know you didn’t bring me here for this. I also asked him for some wheels so I could get around and not feel confined. And like the good FATHER HE is, poof! The very next day I found a place and a car I could afford. Talking about grateful! 

Next thing was my shipment from Gambia. Now that was a headache because of miscommunication. I only found out last week where the shipment was and now I’ve got to pay all kind of crazy storage fees. Dang!

Then the publishing company that I had contracted with to publish my book last April sent me an email saying that they were not going to publish it because they didn’t have much success at publishing books of that particular genre. Huh, what!? They knew what they were getting when they asked me to contract with them. Hmph!!!!

Not to mention that my children’s lives are somewhat turmoil these days. Geez! This is the main reason why GOD has brought me back here. Just to be here for them. Whether they call me or not to reach out to me for me to help, I’m here!

I’ve so enjoyed cruising around the city, taking my grand daughter shopping for her birthday, going to church on Sundays and catching up with some old friends. Despite the fact that things have not gone the way I would’ve wanted it I so appreciate all that is in my life. And I know it only will get better!

People ask me if I miss Africa, well all I can say is that in spite of all the cards in the air I’m too busy enjoying the moment to miss anything!

Here to There

Well it’s been a while since we last met here. It’s all on me because I have been silent these past few weeks. I had to keep quiet so I could hear that small still voice that dwells inside of me. I’ve have made some crucial decisions and more importantly my spirit is causing me to reposition myself. 

I’ve prayed about it, asked for a sign and received it. As difficult as it may be I’ve decided to leave Gambia and move back to the states. Yep, out of Africa for now. Hold on, wait a minute, not my organization, just my physical being.

This is not an easy thing to do. I’ve lived here for almost 10 years. 9 years and 5 months to be exact. So I liken this part of my journey as gestation period in the womb of Mother Africa.  She has nurtured me and fed me with her many riches and now it is time to come forth.

This all feels weird and at times quite unreal or at least surreal. I imagine this is how a baby feels when it has reached full term in the womb. No matter how you turn, which ever way you stretch there isn’t enough room. It was my spirit that led me here and now it is leading me on, almost like a pull that I can’t resist. There are some greater things waiting on me, I can feel it and I must be where GOD wants me to be to receive these great blessings HE has for me and also to be a blessing to others. I knew that when GOD gave me the inspiration for It’s Nice To Be Nice International httpwww.intbn.org  that it was not only to be in Gambia, but in whatever part of the world HE chose to send me to. I’m being obedient so who knows where to from here. 

I’ve discovered and rediscovered so many things about myself. I’ve learned how deep, strong and widespread are my roots. Many of us from the African Diaspora long to reconnect with our African Heritage, to know our ancestral roots, but what I also discovered is that my roots are not only in Africa, but they are also in North America. So my love is far and wide. My family is there in the states and I can not ever forget that or them. They need me, I need them!

So, I’ve been packing, selling, shipping and storing my stuff for this major move. It’s hard enough moving from one residence to another, let alone moving from continent to another. And get this, I don't have an address in the states any longer. I'm moving on faith and know that GOD will provide me with what I need and much of what I desire. It’s sort of freeing getting rid of so much stuff though. Furniture, clothing, linen, house wares, office supplies, satellite dish, and electronics you name it. I’ve either sold it or given it away. And as I look around I still got too much stuff! Geez!!!! My vices are clothes, shoes, handbags and the like.  And oh yeah, my art! My art is a reflection of life and places I’ve been; nothing expensive in a material sense, but as I look around at it I see where I’ve been and it also tells me where I want to go.

This is why I’ve been silent all these weeks my friends. It was and is just way too much stuff going on to be able to sort through all the emotions, boxes and suitcases to share. I wanted to make this transition as calm and stress free as possible. To do that I prayed then I’d plan each step in order not to create chaos and be out of my house that I’ve rented here for 6 years on the target date that I set.

I did it and I’m on a countdown now and only have a few days left here. I’m excited by what’s coming next, yet weepy for what I’m leaving behind. Will I come back to Gambia? Of course all things by GOD’s will! I’ve got property here, I’m a citizen of The Gambia and my organization is here......

But right now I’ve got on traveling shoes.